Too many to even condence

The new me versus the old me

What will it come down to be

Will situations from before take over

Or will I be able to show them a new door

Will things settle down

Or will my smile just hide the frown

Will I be able to overcome the obstacles

Or will I get stuck in the hurdles

Tired of being in these questions

Without any idea of solutions

Everything so different with a new day

Days turn into nights

No longer am I pulled into fights

Moments of peace and tranquility

Time and space to be just me

To do what I want and decide what’s right

To take new adventures and board new adventures and board new flights

To live the way I had always wanted

No longer feeling stuck or unwanted

The freedom to go ahead and fly

With each and every new stride

New people new faces

New ways to solve new mazes

And soon there will be a time

Where everything will be just fine

And i will smile again

Without feeling locked in a pen

I will be me

The person I always wanted to be

Yet I can’t help but be sad

Over think things and runaway

Whatever runs in my mind I’ll never say

I imagine too much

And expect things to be such

And maybe I no longer know reality

And grew the wrong mentality

That maybe someone would love me

Someone would just let me be

Through the battles there’s nothing left of me

The person I wanted to be

The things I wanted to see

As each battle took place

I gained a new face

Gained new emotions I never knew

And soon all my dreams flew

All I want to do is disappear

My mind is no where near being cleared

What will the future cost

If I’m standing here feeling so lost

Yet I cant help but be sad

Overthink things and runaway

Whatever runs in my mind I’ll never say

I imagine too much

And expect things to be such

And maybe I no longer know reality

And grew the wrong mentality

That maybe someone would love me

Someone would just let me be

As every person demands

Answers to questions

And gives me commands

Just when everything seemed aright

Reality walked out

And I lost another fight

I’m tired and weak

Time has run bleak

I’ve fallen on my knees

As you witness my defeat

Who I used to be

What the future holds

I can no longer see

Bid me farewell now

So I can bear the pain as you leave

Forever alone

A reality that never left me.

Tired of everything

Tired of hearing

“You cant do anything”

For once let things go my way

For once just let me stay

For once hear me out

Stop saying your lies out loud

You loved me since I did what you wanted

Any wish of mine left ungranted

I wasn’t allowed to speak my mind

And  with each year stronger grew your bind

And now when I fight back

Your telling me I’m offtrack

I don’t want to follow anymore

I want to open new doors

I feel as if I can achieve success

Please help me and relieve my stress

Don’t hold my hand and lead me

Trust me and let me make my own keys

Just help me out today

So I can make your tomorrow a better day

Everyday there is something new

That makes the water flow from my eyes

And never lets the pain die

Constantly reminded of what a pain I am

So why did you want me in the picture then?

I’m tired of hearing your cries

And saying your the only one who tries

Words said in anger I shouldn’t take to heart

You should know me better that letting that sentence start

Every word of yours is a piercing dart

Yet you still want to claim every part

Its become a never ending cycle

Where you come in and affect me by the

Taunts you use and the names you call me

And telling me the failure I’m going to be

I’m done hearing what my future is going to be

It’s time for you to let go of me.

With only darkness in front of me

Scared to take the next step

Of what’s going to happen to me

Will I lose another loved one?

Is someone going to just walk away?

So many questions in mind

Yet little time to think, to stay

My world constantly changes

People coming and going

With new ideas and thoughts

Always questioning what I’m doing

Maybe if I was given my wings back

I would soar above all and fly

Be who I really am

And tell the fake me goodbye

Yet once again I’m pushed forward

Without the chance to say “there is no ground”

Through the darkness I fall

Not being able to see anything around

I’m wounded and hurt

Yet I still getup and wipe off the dirt

I am alone, May forever be alone

But I will fight and soon claim my throne